The most messed up Aussie kids TV shows from the 90s

5 min read

Looking back on the 90s is always fun, but once we started remembering our favourite kids TV shows we realised we didn't dream how messed up some of them were!

Seriously! Think about all the best shows you watched in the 90s, and suddenly you'll find yourself half weeping, half singing the Mulligrubs theme...

Here's the most terrifying of the bunch, and an insight into what the hell the show's creators may have been thinking.

1. EC from Lift Off

Oh, what do kids like? How about a filthy doll? Not weird enough? Get rid of the face, make it move and, oh yeah, give it SPECIAL POWERS.

Yeah, that's what kids like. That and nightmares.

2. BEVERLY from Lift Off

But wait, guys, EC isn't weird enough. Sure, he's scary (she's??) but what if we throw in a giant living plant with an all seeing eye?

Yeah, great idea. 

3. THE MULLIGRUBS FACE

So, we've perfected the weird faceless doll, but you know what kids want these day - a MASSIVE FLOATING PURPLE FACE WITH NOSTRILS FOR SOME REASON.

Yes, that's definitely a thing, let's do that.

4. ALFRED on Johnson & Friends

OK, we've totally nailed the floating face thing, but what's a toy kids love?

Hot water bottles.

Nailed it. Make him as sploshy as you can.

5. Also, McDUFF from Johnson & Friends.

Here's a crazy, unmoving face to HAUNT YOUR NIGHTMARES. Enjoy.

6. Not to mention, JOHNSON himself.

Honestly, this show was balls to the wall freak out city.

7. AGRO from Cartoon Connection

A mean, murder-eyed puppet who may or may not be harrassing his co-host to point of actual distress, if you remember him fondly, get on the Google and Bing yourself the Youtube of his outtakes. It's an OH&S nightmare.

8. BLACKBOARD from Mr Squiggle

Grumpy, gruff, mean and rude. Kids who met him probably left in tears. What a jerk.

9. Oh, and MR SQUIGGLE himself.

Moon man + pencil nose.

Nope.

10. HUMPHREY B. BEAR

You either love him or grew up terrified of him. He has no pants, but has nothing to hide. But he won't speak. So... what's he hiding??

11. COREDOR on Plasmo

Some suggested that his face may or may not look like a lady's reproductive organs, but we're not sure...

You can't unsee it now.

12. PLASMO and PARSTY

They're cute, right?? No, they're sad and weird and creepy.

13. THE BOOK WORM from The Book Place

*silent weeping*

14. LION from Magic Mountain

The whole show was a bit weird, but just the way this Lion dude gets around is really unsettling...

15. THE CHIEF from Halfway Across The Galaxy and Turn Left

Dem eyeballs... scary.

Written By Andy Zito
Andy Zito

Yikes.

“Don’t worry parent police, I’m a professional.” 

Umm... KIM!!!